no title

look isn't it crazy!?

i've been posting?


regularly?

SUCK IT MY USUAL MODE OF OPERATION


suck it long hard and deep (<---- i'm so so sorry for that)


seriously, sorry.

terra mojada

Through the next scene Jay, Kay and Elle are all sitting at the table that they were sitting at in the previous scene. Jay and Kays backs no longer to the audience. They sit on either side (stage L and stage R). Elle is UP Stage Center.

Elle - I'm sorry, you just looked so uncomfortable.

Kay - Did we?

Jay - I'm sure we did.

Kay - We're not.

Elle - You're not.

Jay - I'm sure we just seemed uncomfortable.

Kay - We tend to seem uncomfortable.

Beat

Beat

Jay - The tea's good.

Elle - I'm sorry, tend to seem uncomfortable?

Kay - Yes.

Jay - Not too hot. There was plenty of time to let it cool.
I'm sure that you must have the leaves, bags?
I'm sure I taste actual leaves (but I'm no expert), in first and then added the boiling water.

Beat

Was there some lemon already in the tea? It isn't lemon tea though, it barely needs any honey or sugar.

Beat

I like honey better, the sugar tends to collect too much at the bottom of the cup;

Beat

it's like drinking a sweet sediment from the base of a river.

Kay - I never really got the hang of drinking tea.

Elle - The hang of drinking tea?

Kay - Yes.

Elle - Well I'm glad one of you is enjoying the tea.

Kay - I didn't say I didn't enjoy it.

Elle - Well at least this was only the beginning.

Jay - More tea?

Elle - No.

Kay - Great. We'll we're ready/

Elle - Yes, I can see that.

Kay - Yes. You told us.

Jay - I'm just glad we got here on time.

Elle - Why?

Jay - Well you see/

Kay - No reason.

Elle - What makes you think you came here on time?

Jay - You said we were early.

Elle - Unless they have changed the definition of On Time

On Time does not mean early.

Early means before the expected time.

I expected you at a certain time and you most surely came before the expected time.

Kay - Would you like we should go?

Leave.

Take all our preparations and come back tomorrow.

The day after.

Beat

We've proved we can find you.

And it took even less than the time we gave ourselves.

Jay - It wasn't hard. I knew we would get here on time.

I just get so nervous about time and being on time,

not making anyone wait.

Beat

Waiting can be the worst part.

Elle - I'm sure.

Jay - I don't know about you but the waiting,
the waiting...is the worst.
Because it's so much more than just waiting; it's expecting.
Expectations not met
and it comes in waves, non-stop, swelling and growing.
I mean there I am waiting, expecting and that's when it starts:
Why aren't they here?
What time is it?
Did I give them the right address?
Did I give them the right directions?
Did they ask for directions?
What time is it?
What time did I say to be here?
Is it the right day? (of course it's the right day)
Is it time?
What time is it?

Beat

What time is it?

Beat

Kay, what time is it?

Kay - It should be about time.

Elle - Uh, yes yes. Now should be the right time.

Kay - So...

Elle - Yes. I'm sorry. I'll be back in a moment.

Elle Exits

Kay - What a bitch.

Jay - God, are you for real right now?

Kay - What? She's a bitch.

Jay - Yes, but don't say that out loud.

Kay - Whatever. It doesn't matter.

Jay - She's already making this harder than it should be. And that shitty attitude you have isn't helping.

Kay - It's not like she wouldn't be such a twat if I was acting like care bear.

Jay - Well I guess well never find out because that odds of that happening are pretty low now aren't they.

Kay - Yes. Yes they are.

Elle Enters

Elle - O.K. I think we can start.

come and find me

Elle-
Good you made it! Good, great.
This is great.
This...this, well I can't begin to tell you how important this is going to...how necessary, but that can wait.
I'm just glad you made it.
Early!
It's brutal out there, the elements and...everything. But, yes good you came!
Prepared. I see that; yes very much prepared.
I was always taught it was crucial to be prepared.
For anything. Well at least somethings.
In a perfect world I was supposed to be prepared for everything.
But who can do that? Do you know how much everything is?
It's a lot. By definition it is a lot.
No, yes, at my best I was prepared for somethings.
At my worst, I was prepared for the minimal catastrophe, the minimal disturbance, the minimal problems, the scrapes, bruises but not the uncontrollable, not the torrents that would come raining down.
But yes! You two. Very much in the opposite camp as myself.
Tea? Coffee? Sit.
While still, early.
You really should have some tea or coffee.
It's brutal out there.
Yes tea or coffee would be best.
and sit.
Sit.
Preparation. Yes.
I remember my mother would teach me the art of preparation.
Trust me it is an art.
But look at me preaching to the choir as they say.
An art, meticulous. Constant training and relearning.
But with an intuition of course. Sparks.
Revelations.
In all things.
Let me get you more.
It's something that you can't forget, no, forgetting is the worse kind of sacrilege.
I still remember being wrapped up; tight to the point of suffocation. Thick itch wool biting at my neck. Trading one redness and pain for another.
Arms restrained, bound severe and perpendicular to my body.
But it was good, it worth it.
Like all things that are difficult. worth it.
In the end.
Resilience, strength.
But I'm sure you two know all about that.
You made it here for christsake.
Sugar? milk
Is it too hot?
Not for the weak willed.
Drink up.

el aire que respira

Jay - We're headed the right way...? Right?

Kay - ...Yes...probably...definitely.

Jay - What makes you say probably?

Kay - We're fine.

Jay - You just/

Kay - /I know what you're gonna say "You sounded so hesitant" "you waited to long to respond"

Jay - Yes and Yes

Kay - I said I would get us there and that's what I'm doing.

Jay - With your incredible sense of direction

Kay - I don't see you helping.

Jay - Constructive criticism/

Kay - /Is not a real form of helping. Plus! it's not what you're doing.

Jay - Don't tell me what I'm doing.

Kay - I'm telling you what you're NOT doing. Difference.

Jay - Ha! Semantics!

Kay - God! What are you doing to help?

Jay - ...Conversation?

Kay - Argument is not conversation.

Jay - Yeah sure it's not

Kay - What would stop me from leaving you here? You don't know where we are...

Jay - Shut up neither do you...that's why we stopped/

Kay - ONLY a vague idea where we're going/

Jay - Please! You don't know any better than I do

beat

Jay - Are we headed the right way?

Kay - Oh, I'll get us there. Even I have to murder and drag your body 100 miles/

Jay - Seriously that far?/

Kay - JUST so you'll stop asking if we're headed the right way.

Jay - You wouldn't be able to carry this much weight.

Kay - What're you; a buck 70? 80?

Jay - Thanks Paul Bunyun. There's a difference between dead weight and non-dead weight

Kay - Undead weight.

Jay - Night of the living, day of the. dawn of the, all movies about heavy think moving bodies

barreling towards you with no escape in sight.

Kay - Their arms, legs, their whatevers would break so easily.

Jay - Rot, decay. Time.

Kay - Solution. I'll wait a few days; brush away the maggots, worm etc. and then we'll see who's

carrying who.

Jay - Whom

Kay - ....fine....

Jay - So you're saying that it would take a few days?

Kay - Yeah, you know, to make sure enough is eaten away.

Jay - Or to get there, I mean if it's going to take a few days,

I mean if you have the time, I mean need the time to wait...

Kay - The soft tissue would go first. I guess the eyes, the fat

Jay - Because you said you knew how to get there.

Kay - And enough would fall away from the tougher, resilient, annoying stuff

Jay - And we've been walking for a while

Kay - Then just give a good ole heave

Jay - So you/

Kay - Jesus. We're here.

Boink-Boink in the Oink-Oink

After a rocky start, everything seems to be coming together. Yes, after the trains, the walking, the bus, things are starting to look up.

It's the holidaze. Well it's one particular holiday!

THANKSGIVING

pssh spanksgiving.

And we're all up in Upstate's snatch and it smells good (ughhh gross)!

Now any other liberal would take this space and talk about, indigenous genocide and stolen lands and misappropriation of history etc...

But not here, not now because, while all those things are true and are even more important to talk about; it's annoying.

Espesh if it's done stuffily (stuffingly?).

What I'm talkin' 'bout is delicious food in large quantities and fresh air and drinking at like 12 noon and walking up the next day at about 11!

It's about being with people that love you and that you love and being able to escape the city and walk around in the dark without seeing the constant lights from buildings and street lamps, only seeing the occasional car's headlights disappear, it's red back end winking out of existence.

It also about feeling a little bit of that loneliness that comes when you remember past holiday's and thinking about the people that you once spent them with and the next time you'll see them.

It's also about obscenely stuffing your face with as much Glazed Ham as humanly possible. I almost wrote Glazed Hamm which would also be delicious in amore erotic kinda way; possibly (definitely) stickier.

At the end of my second heaping helping (ole school 'lliteration) o'ham/garlic mashed potatoes/cranberries sauce/biscuits, I swore off of food.

Until the coffee/pumpkin cheesecake/walnut cookies came out.

GAME ON my friends

GAME ON.

And this left use around 7 in the evening which lead to much beer and wine and cognac with much playing of card games!

Rummy!

Who a new a game that's almost essentially for old white ladies would be somemuchfun?

Well maybe not so surprising since THANKSGIVING is a holiday essentially celebrating old white people! (<----- political!)

Then a nice little walk near some woods, where if we had somehow stubbled into a scary movie I would most certainly be the first to die. Not because I'm a double minority but because I'm a slutty double minority. I was excited and I ran to the cemetery, grabbed Mr. 6'4'' and started getting my mack on.

This would be the point on the story, when I would stop and say, "What did you here that?" (which I did say)

Mr. 6'4'' "wonkster stop playing around"

"no seriously, wait here" (which I did say)

I would walk up the hill closer to woods, flashlight in hand, leaving Mr. 6'4'' behind no flashlight but safer near the road. I would turn back flashlight point at Mr. 6'4''. All of a sudden there would be a rustle and a rush my light would go out, the sound of tearing flesh whether by instrument, teeth or claws (depending on the genre) would be heard, I would be dead and Mr. 6'4'' would be left alone to run back to the house and see how the rest would play out.

But it didn't happen that way.

BECAUSE IT'S THANKSGIVING

duh

ch-ch-ch-changes

I've made some changes to this piece of shit.

look it's Yelle!

It looks pretty kewl right?


look! It's El Guincho! Look! It's NSFW

(for a whoooooole bunch a titties)




It's kinda misogynist but it looks cools so it's a'ight right?




PS I CHANGED THE LAYOUT


?

yeah but yeah but why

I most (what is 1, 2?) people that ready this blog know, I like to make loud and proud proclamations (<---- that took me like 4 times to get the right spelling...i also had to use spell check...) about what I'm doing and blah blah.

I j-j-joined a gym. For the low low price of $75 you too can join your local NEW YORK CITY gym. Well state run Y...but but the one near me has a nice pool. so ey'body can suck it.

suck it hard

suck it long and hard

...ummmm this isn't that type o'blog pervert.

So yes, your truly has joined a gy-um no matter how, to use a classist and apparently kinda racist term, "podunk" it still counts. Pretty soon I'll be...all...I can't even think of an adjective of what my body will look like because unless I get a personality transplant, my xxxercise will be inconsistent at best.

I have started drinking more water, so that's something.

I have started thinking about starting eat better. So, while I'll still eat a burger and sweet potato fries, I'll feel bad about eating that meal. Sorta.

sorta.





but only a little...