baby baby baby

I'm sitting in a smoking livin' room.

Smoky becaurz I just cooked some motherfuckin' sausage up in this bitch!


?


I'm also sitting in the livan'roomz watching Whatever Martha in which a fantastic show where Martha Stewarts daughter Alexis and a friendie that she has named Jennifer (some girl with red hair) watch Martha Stewart Living, do the projects and are just snarky and awesome.





heh


That's all I got. I got nothin' more boom bow no more boom bow bow


ugh:(

and the sun was all

After a less than exhausting day at werk
< exhaust
I'm back at chez moi; shirtless, pants undone, mustache in full bloom; yes I'm from Oh HI Oh and it shows the most at these moments. TWIIIIST: I'm watching RuPaul Rupaul Race: Start Your RuPauls™.


They are making books n things for this episode.

Which gets me wondering what would my book be called. I only think that because I'm a RAGIN' narcissist. I'm a narwhal narcissist. That could the title:

Narwhal Narcissist: Memoirs of a Something Something Such n' Such

[insert: this is what the cover would look like]


Yes, that is a decapitated narwhal and yes, that is me and yes those are big sunglasses and yes, that picture was taken with my Macbook camera and yes, I wrote a lot of yeses (yesi) to bring awareness to my horrible writing skillz.

This is what the first two sentences of my MEMEiors:
I remember, or at least remember being told that I should remember, that I was with mon pere (french? mon dieu); near some park...near some park, near some handball courts...near some park, near some handball courts, in California just takin a lil' walk. I walked up to a dog (squee) then was bitten on the foot, hard, I was four.

Does that make you want to read it? No? That's what I thought.



and that my friends(?).

is



that

bustin' out all over

It's been a crazy beautiful weekend beeotch.

It's been one of those weekends where it's a shame to be inside. So I've been not lazy enough to actually be outside and enjoy the weather! Instead of doing what I'm...doing...right/write now and chilling in the livin' roomz relaxin' on my blog.

So I'm chilling and relaxin' at the same time. I think I'll dub it chillaxin' and that friends is how werds are invented.

[insert: yup]

oh some other asshole invented that? Well that's NEWS TO ME. Nothin' new unda teh sunz. Accept for all the lithe hipsters venturing out in the sun.

Friday night I was all set for staying in and having a good night sleep.

PSYCH

A friend (I guess technically it's more of an acquaintance, since we only met 2 weeks before I moved from Chicago and hung out 1.5 times before I left, and not much talking happened IFFFF youknowwhatImean), was in town and he called (txt'd, whatever) me and asked to hangsies. So we did.

Major queer checklist were hit: Metropolitan and Sugarland. Yes, There are only two major standard checks in this part of town. Welcome. We ran into a mutual friend at metro. This friend of our has the remarkable gift to literally make friends with anyone. Anyone that has ever been born. No matter the disposition, he will be able to make friends with them. It's kind of amazing to watching it happen.

We (I) also saw ED DROSTE from Grizzly Bear™. It was kinda squee worthy. He's also a lot taller then I expected; handsomer too. So that was my Alt Celebrity Sighting™ of the week, ugh fine, of the year.

[insert: deep sea diver]


I got us lost on the way to Sugarland. How? I dunno when it's literally a 10 minute walk from Metro. I'm just an idiot i guess. There was a party going on so lots of queers (not just gay boiz) and dykes. It was awesome.

One of the go-go dancer lit her tassels on fire. ON FUCKING FIRE. Then she twirled them, oh how she twirled them. They were like comets orbiting the planet the were her breasts.
[insert: wheels on fire]


Oh, we ran into some friends of DS7. They tried to take us home with them (because they got kicked out of Sugz) and when we declined they called me fat and my friend a leprechaun.

[insert: Welcome to Brooklyn™.]

AN-E-WHEY

After we danced we ummmm left...sure we'll go with that.


Yesterdaze I went to Prospect Park. It takes about 40 minutes to get there via bus. It's a nice autobus ride. You pass through a Hasidic neighborhood. then a largely AfroCaribbean hoodz. While I was ridin the bus I was noticing how extremely cinematic this stupid city is. Everything; the buildings, the people, the layout everything. No matter there are so many moo-veez about new york.

I went to the park for a Queer Picnic. There was hummus, bread, cheese, fruit and wine for all. It was pretty queer. Many be-tattoed, tank top wearing, cut-off shorts having, big sun glasses rocking queers enjoying the sun.

Heaven.
[insert: prrrrrrrk]


Gave my friend a haircut after that.

Then went home and sleeeeept for like 12 hours. nice. Because I didn't get much sleep friday night. WIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINK



see what i did there?

I'm currently watching John Tuck Must Die on FX™? while simultaneously watching the BBC special on mammels. David Attenborough(spelling?) can talk me to sleep any time. Put I don't want to see you. Get of my screen now plz thanks.

Penn Badgley is in J T must D, with a horrible haircut; disgusting and long.


I did laundry today. It's awesome and it's sitting on my bed, were it will remain for the foreseeable future. Unless I drunkenly put it away, which is a very real possibility.






happy sunday

e la metodolagia

Y otra ves vi al mucho del tren. This time on the street.

I'm a street bitch baby

[insert: no not at all]



I saw him when I was WALKING HOME FROM THE TRAIN STATION yes that happened. Well, at least I think it was him? I did a double take but I'm pretty sure it was him?

Well i dunno if it was him or not but the melancholy romantic in me wants it to be him. Since it would mean that he lives near where I live and the chances of me seeing him have grown. I can also indulge in my super melancholy place, because he was with another boiz, that could be his boi'frien, but might not be, it might just be a boi that is a frien'.

So playing with the scenarios can be fun and horrible but maybe I'll run into him again and talk to him?

maybe.

so it was him and that's that.

still worth while

Today on my way to work (at noon I might add, awwww yea sucka' it was awesome), I saw this v/kayute d00d on the traaaaain.

And what I mean to say: On my way to work I saw this really cute guy on the train. Thanks to the packedattudidness of the train, thanks a lot L, I wasn't able to creepily admire him as much as I would've allowed myself to. But eye contact was definitely made and once the guy alighted (<-----I studied in London! for a little! which explains the word usage), there was more eye contact and smiles. Smiles! Its true!

I'll probz never see him again and as such will never know his name but it was a nice way to start the morning.




Like i wasn't going to but this


who do you think you are?

might as well

Buy a ticket to California, which is what I did.

Sure, I have other bills to pay, but you know, buy it while the buyin' is good?

Yeah, we'll go with that.

[insert: califoooooornia here we coooooooooooooooooome]


But this is far in the future; in JULY! So while I'll feel the pinch now, once July rolls around Future Me™ will think Past Me™ was pretty smart. Pretty...pretty clever.
So soon, but not too soon, one of my besties on the enetz and I will be hangin' out on the West Coast.

West Coast: Best Coast?

East Coast: Yeast Coast?


So that's the what the future looks like or maybe it'll look like this.

[insert: scarepocalypse now!]

I was pretty tired for most of the day today. I came home and laid in bed with my mind on my money and my money on my mind. I also watched Arrested Development.

So good.




cornballing piece of sh*t

bottle of white bottle a' red

So it's:
T-minus 3 and a half hours till tattie time.

My excitement needs some kind of outlet, so it might as well be writing in this.

PRODUCTIVE!

And also...I could get in troubz, since I am at........work

but whatevz, i say, EVZ!

So it's c-werkerz b-day celebration today but since I have my tattoo appt at 7 i'm going to meet up with the peeps afterward. After Words.


I've got to the point where I cant concentrate. Not even on this. I'm basically just tip tappin' away for no reason, and with no direction. Which is what I normally do n e way, but this time it's even more pointless/directionless/meaningless.

When i'm in this state I feel like my punctuation gets so much worse. But so what who cares, I know you don't or you would have stopped reading this long ago and I know I don't or else I woulda stopped writing this....long ago. So a lot of things might have happened that haven't and alot if things will happen that you or I have no control over, like me writing in this blizzog. Sounds like: Bliss Log or Bliss Bog.

something with bliss in it and something that makes no sense.
Nothing makes sense.
you don't make sense.
this blog espesh doesn't make sense or cents.

i should stop


we won't stop; we can't stop

but i can

back from the

After a double today at work I've found myself in sitting on our great aunt puffy chair which GR∑∑K.

This is after a pretty fun/exhausting Sunday night. Thank you Oscars™. The party was really fun and full of food and drink and merriment. I didn't get home till like 200 AM!

A to the M I say!
Then I crashed once I got home. It was goooood.
I awoke exactly on time to be at work exactly on time. I basically woke up hit the snooze on my alarm and then woke up 20 minutes after my ten minute snooze.

of course.

But I, by some March Madness Miracle™, got to work on time....ish. So it was all good.


So i'm sleepy.

flying a

It's that time again where I kinda just leave myself time enough to write whatever I want in this thing.

Oh, wait, I've confounded myself, I already do write whatever I want in this bucket o' shit that is my blizzy.

I awoke this morning to the sounds of belts hitting flesh, and I thought to myself, "ah, another Sunday morning." You don't see specials about THAT on CBS. Heh, imagine.

[insert; yeah...think about that]



After I steeled myself and metaphorically scrubbed out my ears with symbolic(?) bleach, I made some breakfast!

[insert: it didn't look like this]

Well it sorta looked like that, but the toast had jam! Jams I tells ya!

I started watching Archer the new cartoon on FX™. It's a total bro cartoon, but I can't help but find it fun/funny. This is only because I'm a sucker for cartoons talking abut fucking and saying bad words. This new sub genre of comedy that is part Arrested Development/Family Guy/It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia/something else with a more masculine feel to it, is still somewhat of a mystery to me. They are completely aware of, i guess i would say their offensiveness but that somehow seems wrong. It's like they are being satirical about being crude. I'm not sure they are being anti-pc, which can be a legitimate form of expression (only sometimes and if done well ie. Arrested Development and 30 Rock), but they are just kinda being so outlandishly crude and vulgar it becomes a commentary on why we find certain things vulgar. I'm not sure that makes sense.

Oh well, I did L-O-L at it. So that something.

I just took a lil nap listening to Jo-jo Newsy. It was good.

this wasn't a long as i thought it would be






that's what








no one said

shooting stars

I've done nothing today. I'm so tiiiiiiiiiired, while i was typing that I was trying to think of a way to incorporate tire iron, but I couldn't, so...tire iron.

[insert: I don't know why I think of these things, I just do, then I write them down]


Last night a couple of coworker and I went out to a magazine party at SUGARLAND, the local gay discotheque. There where a lot of hotties hawtees hot teas(?) there. As per usual I went home alone and drunk and cried myself to sleep while i was eating a sandwich.

scene:

Door opens to a disheveled apartment.
An assortment of shoes strewn near the entrance.
Miscellaneous clothes and underwear are in the kitchen (the bathroom is located off of the kitchen, so it isn't as gross as it sounds, but still pretty, ooky).
The florescent lights turn on to a be-suspendered 23 year old homosexual with one pant leg rolled up to reveal a tube sock worn over the calf (he was trying something for the evening, whatever he thought it looked ok).
He makes a sandwich, turns on his laptop, starts crying hysterically.

end scene

I joke, I joke.....or do I?




I wouldn't kick that outa bed

here's Lola

Well not really.
Here's Annie she is an artist at Three Kings Tattoo where I'ma get my tatz.......!!

It's going to be a lighthouse with some seagulls and it's going to b awesome. Annie is really great and I feel comfortable around her, so that's good. I wouldn't want some creepster to be all up in my business with a sharp needle.

NO THANKS CREEPSTER GET AWAY FROM ME.


Here is some of the pitchers I gave as inspiration:

[insert: in spear nation]










Here is a picture of Harrison Ford

[insert seXXXy]





It's the Oscars™ this weekend™ time for Oscar Parties™


mother knows best

ta da to do

after the shit storm that was today these are the two things that I find my only solace in


here

and

here


I also stopped by at the tattoo parlour that i'ma get my next tattie. Tomorrow I'm meeting with my artist.




everything sucks?





so do you?

i was tired of

I just got done watchin' GR∑∑K (I know, I know, suck it, I do what I want, you don't know me and other inanities) and this v. spesh episode, (*sigh, aren't they all!) was all 'bout growin' and leaving things behind and choicing things that were important enough to maintain or important enough to acknowledge their impact and leave them behind.

[insert: Greek is totes heavy ya'll]


Annnnnnnyway, the one(?) thing that annoys about time specific genres, ie high school/college teebee shü's is their heavy handed importance placed on the brevity of their experience, as if having a 4 year time stamp somehow makes these moments in our lives more authentic. (<--------Well will you look at that run-on!).
The arbitrary 4 years and the whole, "I WISH THESE DAYS WOULD NEVER END," while making good and funny and sad entertainment, kinda forces a viewer to compartmentalize their experiences. Without looking at your history, one can be tricked into thinking that you leave things behind. In reality, I think, you carry these things with you they, grow on you and create the person you have become and a are going to continue to grow into. Like a mold or fungus or weird mole.

By breaking them down and segmenting them off, they are easier to digest, you still gotta take it all in sooner or later. Like the whole pie I ate that one time.

[insert: suuuuuuure one time]



like that

my face cracked

it's time for story time:

There was a small seed that was planted in the middle of a field. A field that was surrounded with tall willows and birches and populated with poppies, bright red that looked like freshly made kool-aid (a color so vivid it looked unreal, almost to the point of cartoonishness).
This seed had giant seed-like dreams; to grow and swell and bloom and perhaps populate the field with others like it so it wouldn't be lonely. If not lonely than at least not alone. So this seed began to anchor itself down and grow. It thought it was a real fucking big shot, with each growing pain the seed felt a twinge of pride, and thought,
"Yup, this is my time."
What the little seed did not realize, because the seed was too focused on himself, was there was a beautiful masked Green Jay with it's emerald coat that also lived near the field. While, the seed had big dreams and a plan, the Green Jay had dreams, a plan, ambition, plus the fool could fly.
Could the seed fly?
NO, because it was a seed, duh.
The Green Jay spotted this little seed that was now a little sprout. It usually didn't waste it's time with sprouts but it was feeling slightly peckish and fate sometimes sets things in motion that are unfair and unavoidable. So, like a green missile zeroing in on its target the Green Jay swallowed the little sprout that was a little seed in one fell swoop.
The sprout/seed didn't see it coming, didn't notice the shadow and in the end didn't feel the quick pluck. So that was the end of the seed.

There was no propagation for the seed. Was it a willow? a poppy? It probably was something kinda lamer, I dunno, and I guess no one will ever know.


The end