Wow, what a stupid way to start a post. Stupid and cheesy and delicious and potentially heart attacky like the new KFC HeartTerminatrex.
But you know, I can't help it.
So let's get "down n' dirty" into the real "nitty gritty," to the "meat n' potatoes" to the other folksy saying of why I'm written in this mofo.
GLEE.
obviously.
Glee, or gLee as I like to type it, premiered last night. It was amazing, of course. I'm not that blinded by the glitter and rainbow puppies that is this show to say that it was perfect but it was pretty gosh darned good.
There were moments when the writing was a little uneven. For example: Emma's return to her position, Finn and Rachel's relash and Puck n Quinn's relash. I gueeeeessssss you could say a'duh Emma is going to come back and Rachel would wrangle in Finn but come on, give us sooooome reasoning. Some seasoning reasoning.
But God Damn! Brittany what a beautiful/stupid character! From gay sharks to forgetting her own name there is not one thing that is wrong with B, except for perhaps her chromosomal levels.
The addition of Jesse St. James (ie: my future husband -slash- current sweet sweet fantasy) was amazing. He and Rachel are like one of those couples that make you want to tear your eyes out with their ambition but when they sing it...mmmhmmm I wouldn't kick that out of bed. Well I wouldn't say no to that in bed n e ways so.....that's that.
Let's talk about some tunes shall we?
Hello, I Love You as sung by local JockTard Finn was great b/c well he doesn't have a pretty voice; he has a voice made for classic unpolished rock. It was good cuuuuurz it was his style and he also wasn't too horrible AutoTuned. So that was fun.
Hello by the All 'Merican Rejectz (or something) was owned by Rachel. She bitch slapped Finn with her vocals, so that was you know...good for her! After he totally ditched her for a potential threesome....duh.
The most outstanding number was Hello with Rachel and Jesse because Jesse is as talented (I almost wrote ass talented, which would also be true) as Rach. And he has the confidence of 3 Regional wins. The harmony were like two voices fucking it was that good.
Jesse showed how awesome he was with Highway to Hell, sure it was a little to sugary and playful but THAT BOY CAN SANG. Again Jesse, or I guess ,actor who plays Jesse, I'm here, here for you and waiting.
Hello, Goodbye was pretty good the dynamic between Rachel and Finn was fun, if not a little contrived. Finn fine you'll try to idiot woo her with you idiot charm and now we have ANOTHER love triangle (babble triangle) to hear about.
Let's talk about the non-singing:
Each time Sue Sylvester is on screen, I die from joy. Her loathing for Glee club seeps from her pores in the most organic way that is just amazing. She bribes her students, mocks and harasses her co-workers, (hatchet to the groin! ouch!) and Drugs and Pseudo-Rapes and Blackmails her employer, she is the all-American hero. I think right?
Terri was phenomenal, she knows how to twist the knife so gently in Emma's side that it's kind of like watching a artist shade a landscape. Good for you Terri, you crazy bitch, good for you.
Idina Menzel...errrr...I mean Shelby C. was a little wooden, but hopefully she'll get better. She'll make a good villain and I hope she totez bones Will. Sidenote: Will being sexy can tone it down like 50 percent, seriously, you freak me out. Stop. Thanks.
So that was gLee.
It was awesome, can't wait for the rest of this halfsies season.
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